November just ended and very fast dec had started..everybody thought i'm not worry and not rush to find a job. actly I'm worry...i worry about my loan payment actually, just that I don wan to show my worries to them because it is useless to do so..
this few night b4 I sleep, I felt so pressure..keep on thinking about my job, my loan, and most My FUTURE...
At first I still very clear about my way, I know what job I want..but after searching for job for few months, I have lost myself..really totally lost...
Actually I felt like working in 4 types of jobs, first is event management, secondly is marketing for company, thirdly is marketing for magazine and last job that is a 'far far cant reach job'.
for this few months, I keep on searching for event and marketing jobs but failed..the laz 2 jobs i mentioned above is impossible I can work for..because of this I felt very lost...donno wat else I can work anymore...Felt myself useless although I have a degree...
I felt happy when my hp rang in the morning or noon time because mostly is call me for an interview, but I have attended few interview and yet they didnt take me...Everyday wake up the first thing I do is on9, to check my job status in jobstreet whether got company reject me or not..and afterthat I will be searching got wat new position for the day.
I start thinking I cant get a job is because my problem? My english language poor? or because im so unlucky that now is economic downturn?
Nowadays keep on thinking my loan repayment, thinking how long I need to take to clear my debts? I know aunt is helping me to pay the credit card payment while im unemployed but I know she also very sun fu and not enough to use..sorry... besides that, i oso think that how long only can own my first new car, actly I very sarisfied with my car now and i willing to use it for the future 3 or 4 years.the most importantly, I don wan my parents to sit an old car.. my car now is paid by mother, no reason wan her pay for the car and wan her to sit an old car and yet after 3 years when I return the car to her,the car become old car again. I'm not willing to c her 'sun sun fu fu' pay for the car loan but just sitting old car..but after thinking all this..the final ans will be....NO CHOICE...have to bear with this for this moment....I hope my loan repayment period won longer than 3 years..
thinking all this makes me felt pressure...but anyhow, I still need to go on...this wat called life....
posting this article not to get any consolation from peoples, and I don need any consolation as it won help me in it..posting it is just a way to relieve my stress and pressure...